Tuesday, May 5, 2015

201202029 Oh Ga-yeong/ argumentative essay/ Thursday 1-3 p.m.

Sharing music for free

             These days, I cannot hear Christmas songs often in the street on Christmas Day. It's because of the copyright law. Do the world really get better if we strengthen the copyright law? If you don't want to hear beautiful songs in the street, then you can believe in that way. However, I can surely say that most people will be happier when they are surrounded by various music in the streets. So I believe that we don't have to strengthen excessively the copyright law related to music because music is different kinds of property when compared to others and downloading music comparatively costs too much, and because the individual's happiness is greater than material benefits.

             Firstly, music has a little bit different nature from other properties. For example, in case of essays or thesis, people write them to own privately or to be evaluated as purely his or her work. However, people make the music for other people to hear it. Composers want more and more people to listen to their music. So the purpose of making music is to spread happy viruses among the people. Then, making people pay their money for listening to music does not make sense. We should not consider music as simple materials. We should see it as emotional things. So instead of simply paying money for buying the music, we should evaluate music and give points to songs which made us happy.

             Secondly, buying music costs relatively too much. Each song costs about 500 won but with 500 won, I can buy a bottled water. Moreover, we cannot be sure that the song which were chosen by us is perfectly our style. We can be easily fed up with the song. Then, we have to continually pay our money for finding a perfect song. Then, 500 won becomes 2,000 won and then 10,000 won. The poor has also the right to listen to music but if they have to pay their money at this pace, they will rather choose to buy needed food than songs.

             Lastly, individual's happiness when they can hear music at all times, at any place is greater than anything. I can also see the point of people who argue that music is valuable intellectual property and we have to protect it. For sure, the profits which are gained by music companies or composers are important. However, I think that each person's happiness is much more valuable than these kinds of profits because music is the property which has to be shared with many people. Imagine that you can hear all Christmas songs when you walk down the streets. It will definitely make you happy and love the Christmas.

             I know that property right is really important value. So I also think that we have to protect these values but what I want to say is that we don't need to excessively strengthen the copyright law, particularly the law related to music. It's because music is made to share with others and downloading services for music are overcharging us, and finally because individual's happiness is greater than any values. Protecting property is good action but if we are excessively about to protect these values, we can become emotionally drained.     



  1. Hello I am your classmate Seohee, I really enjoyed your post thank you. I could find firstly that your essay has 5 pharagraphs also your thesis statement has your point of view. Your topic sentences are supporting your position and on your third paragraph I could see a counter argument with a refutation. And your reasons are enough detailed that makes your conclusion well stated with different words. I really enjoyed your essay thank you!!

  2. Kim Minji 201200440May 5, 2015 at 8:52 PM

    Hello. I'm Minji Kim. I read your essay with greath interests because I think it's not that strong about property law abou music. If you know how little composers earn money because of a lot of commission to middlemen, you will agree the money we pay for listiening music is not much. Anyway, your essay is well written essay with five paragraphs. The first sentences of each paragrpahs are topic sentence and they drive thesis statments in conclusion. I think the first two sentence in last paragraph is concession and there's many refutation in your essay. How about put a space between each paragraphs? It will make your essay better. Thank you.

  3. Hello I'm Chun Young Ho. I really enjoyed your essay. The first sentences of each paragraphs are viewing your main ideas and it connects yo your thesis statements in conclusion. I also could see a refutation in your essay. It was a little bit hard to view your essay. But I really like your essay